2C-I didn’t ‘Smile’ on Johnny Lewis!

I had never heard of 2C-I until recently. Have you ever heard of it? I picked up another drug case, ho hum, and was waiting on the lab report. The client was popped with a couple of baggies of meth which was no surprise. But, and here’s the weird part – he also had a big bundle of baggies of white powder he was obviously peddling.

Basically you put a small sample inside the envelope, seal it, bend the envelope to break the vial inside, and check for a change in color to indicate the presence of meth or MDMA. It’s so easy that a caveman could do it, which is good because they do.

Now, lots of baggies of white crystalline stuff in a druggie’s pocket with lots of cash, two cell phones, and cryptic drug receipts will raise big red flags for every cop on the planet. It did in this case, too, but our local troopers wasted several NIK field test kits trying to figure out what it was. After about 20 minutes they gave up and sent the stuff in to the lab. The client, of course, was wisely keeping his mouth shut.

Well it turns out it was this new 2C-I drug. My first thought was that it was some kind of thing being marketed to the teen set. You know, like how dealers name drugs after cartoons or whatnot so the kids think it’s funny and fun. I figured this one was named after some robot in the Star Wars movies.

Small baggie of 2C-I otherwise known as ‘Smiles’ for the effect it has on people.

Strangely enough, it wasn’t. 2C-I is a weird designer drug and that’s its strange chemical name. The full name, if you’re really interested, is 2,5-dimethoxy-4-iodophenethylamine  whatever that means.

Supposedly 2C-I was first made by some guy named Shulgin. I have no idea if he knew what he was doing, but he has a great name for an underground criminal chemist. Shulgin, it seems, tinkered around in his home chemistry kit and hit on something really good. You see folks, 2C-I is a new psychedelic drug that makes you feel light, giddy, and excited for the first two hours or so with the occasional hallucination. It also has what’s called entactogenic effects, which are generally described as creating feelings of empathy, love, and emotional closeness to others.

This looks like enough 2C-I to have a really big party with all sorts of friends. If I were this cop, I would be wearing gloves.

That’s right! 2C-I is an exciting love drug that freaks you out. I don’t personally know if its better than ecstasy or what but I think the most obvious customers for 2C-I are going to be the ravers and the young horny party set . . . which turns out to be exactly what my new client was going after. Say what you will about drug dealers, they usually know how to move product.

Now supposedly after the first two exciting hours, the love drug effects of 2C-I start kicking in and last another two to ten hours. I’m taking that one on authority and not speaking from experience. I will say, though, that ten hours of love sounds like it would be exhausting. Maybe fun the first time, though, but you would need lots of viagra.

Anyway, the strange thing about 2C-I is that it sort of started becoming popular in Europe in 2003 or 2004. It wasn’t banned in the United States until July 9, 2012. Sorry folks, but you missed the party train.

Apparently there’s a lot of this stuff out there that got in the country legally but is now a Schedule 1 controlled substance. That means it’s a felony to possess in just about every state in the Union, probably because of the numerous deaths from seizures, kidney failure and fatally high blood pressure that it causes. Imaging that. Listen to what James Mowry, the director of Indiana’s Poison Control Center, says about the effects of 2C-I on people: “They do something that is called ‘uncoupling.’ Basically, their muscles get to the point they cannot uncontract, so they sort of get rigid and then your temperature goes up really high and if you don’t treat them really aggressively, those people usually end up dying.”

2C-I victim or homicidal maniac, take your pick. I guess he didn’t get how the whole ‘love drug’ thing is supposed to work.

I suppose nothing this fun comes without a cost but you don’t want to take some 2C-I and end up going crazy like Johnny Lewis, an actor who used to be on Sons of Anarchy. He took 2C-I then beat his landlady to death, killed and mutilated her cat for some unknown reason, jumped a fence to attack a house painter working next door, then went home to leap to his death in his parking lot. Maybe that whole rigid muscle thing happened in mid flight. I guess I wish it happened before he went up to bother his landlady and that poor cat.

-Samuel Owen

© Samuel Owen 2012. All rights reserved. Please read important notices and disclaimers by clicking here.
Advertisements

Author: Samuel Owen

This is my Lawyer Rant. I've put up with new associates trying to kill me, clients being dangerous idiots, and Judges being rude for far too long. It's time for me to tell it like it really is, and it feels good to give back.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s