Pot shirts and other stupid ideas


Judges just love it when you come walking into court wearing a shirt with a huge marijuana leaf on it and a slogan like “Pot smoker,” “I’m a pothead,” or something equally obvious. I know some states are legalizing marijuana for ‘medicinal’ use and a few are now permitting private recreational use. But Judges are 20 years behind the times. They don’t like this kind of thing. I know at least one Judge that smoked the stuff in the past and even they don’t think these shirts are funny. It’s never OK to wear this stuff to court.

I always shudder when I see some client wearing one of these. Maybe if I’m really lucky the client will also have slightly bloodshot eyes, smell weird, and laugh at stuff that’s not funny. Don’t worry if I’m describing your favorite wardrobe for going to your sentencing hearings. Cops never pick up on obvious stuff, and neither do Judges. After all, they got to their positions in life because they are much dumber than you.

Sometimes I think people just forget what they are wearing when they stagger into the courthouse. Other times, I think they don’t realize civilization doesn’t think obscene t-shirts are funny. At home they have their top five insulting t-shirts in heavy rotation because they think it’s funny to be a jerk. They get belly laughs from their drunken neighbors and the drug addicts hanging around the trailer park so they kind of slip into thinking everyone at the courthouse will think they’re funny too.

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Hey I get that. I mean, if you’re on trial for drug crimes everyone knows you should wear a t-shirt to court advertising your warm and fuzzy feelings about cocaine. If it’s a sex abuse case regarding your step-kids you should wear a hoodie proclaiming you to be “The World’s Best Dad.” If you think about it hard enough, the possibilities are endless. Charged with drunk driving? Wear a shirt telling everyone that you are a drunk. You get the picture.

-Samuel Owen

© Samuel Owen 2012. All rights reserved. Please read important notices and disclaimers by clicking here.

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