Glenmorangie

Any lawyer who orders a glass of 25 year old Glenmorangie neat is somebody you should go talk to. They’re not drinking for the buzz or the show of a fancy cocktail. These drinks are served in a plain glass. It’s usually the high-end crystal, but there aren’t pieces of fruit hanging over the side or those little god awful umbrellas. No, these lawyers are enjoying fine Scotch whiskey on purpose. They know it’s as good as life used to be. It’s doubtful they’re going to suggest you try any because, as they say, if you have to ask what they’re drinking you will never understand what they tell you.

You see, if you’ve never ordered a Glenmorangie then you’ve missed out on one of the rare pleasures of life. This stuff is expensive because of the care with which it is made and the years it ages in old barrels in Scotland. There are other great brands of course, but Glenmorangie is one of the best.

Don’t let the bartender pour it into some crappy regular bar glass. Demand the crystal they keep for these drinks. You’ll see why when he pours. Glenmorangie has a dark orange color like copper and high end leather. The smell makes you forget about the three Stooges from the office you were standing there talking to a minute ago. You’re overcome by the sounds of the Scottish moors and hillsides covered by wet heather. You smell the leather game bags as your Ghillie hands you the shotgun and points to the birds. You can taste the ocean and smoky peat moss on the back of your tongue.

The dummies who throw back a glass of Glenmorangie like it’s Jägermeister have never stood in a salmon stream fishing with a Spey rod in the rain. It’s probably good they never did as it would have been lost on them. They have never dried off their dog after an afternoon of rabbit hunting. After dinner at the lodge they watch TV instead of joining the others out on the porch for a glass of the world’s finest single malt. The world passes some people by while the others savor its true pleasures.

What it says about you: You’re the kind of person everyone else pretends to be when they order clothes from those catalogs.

Your hobby:  Fly fishing, wing shooting, and golf in the off seasons.

You wear:  You are the only person who can actually carry off tweed. You have a scuffed leather handbag that looks exactly like it should when you carry it.

Your car: A Range Rover with a winch on the back.

-Samuel Owen

© Samuel Owen 2012. All rights reserved. Please read important notices and disclaimers by clicking here.

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